Tuesday 20 August 2013

The Breastfeeding Debate

Breastfeeding. One of the biggest debates out there for mothers!  Do I? Don't I?  Am I a bad mum if I don't?  Will I be able to do it?
These are all questions I asked myself when I sat down to decide if breastfeeding is something I want to try or not



Now I have made a decision and I am pretty much sticking to it as I feel its the best thing for me and for my baby, however I do not want my opinion to affect any other ladies in making their decision and I think everybody has their own personal preference, and that's perfectly fine!


I have decided that I won't be breastfeeding our baby.  There are a few reasons why not..


Commitment - Not only have you just carried a baby in your belly for 9 months and gone through childbirth but you're also expected to breastfeed and go through the sometimes agonising pain of that for another good few months or even a year.  For me it just feels like a massive added pressure that could be avoided.  You also need to spend time expressing and that's another thing I am not keen on

The Feeling of Failure - I know a few mums who have attempted to breastfeed and either really disliked the feeling or the baby just would not latch on.  I know how upsetting that can be and its not something I want to put myself or my baby through, if for some reason I couldn't do it.. I hate failing at anything!!!

Sore Boobs - Breastfeeding is likely to make your boobs and nipples so sore.. ouchie.

Less Help - Mr H wouldn't be able to be so involved in feeding time with Harry as obviously he does not have breasts!!  I know this is something he wants to be able to do and it would take a little bit of the pressure off of me.  Friends and Family also love giving feeds to new babies and it will be good again to get some help from them, which you may not be able to accept whilst breastfeeding

Less Convenient - Lets face it its totally not convenient to have to stop off on a car journey to whip your boob out for a quick feed and even less so in a restaurant or a trip at the park

Formula is a Great Substitute -  I have done so much research and found that formula these days is such a great substitute for breast milk so it doesn't really worry me that Harry won't be getting those vital nutrients that his body craves.  I have also found that Aptimil seems to be the best brand amongst bottle feeding mothers and is recommended by midwives and doctors (only if you get a nice one) so this is what I am going to try Harry on to start with



Now obviously there are some down sides of me not breastfeeding and I did take them into serious consideration..



Not Best For Baby - Obviously the main concern was that breast milk is no doubt the best thing you can give your baby in terms of nutrition.  Its also said to help their immune systems whilst growing up and also cure any skin problems they may suffer

Won't Lose Baby Weight - Breastfeeding mothers tend to shed their baby weight almost immediately and this is a down side for me as I would love to get my figure back as soon as possible!!

Can Be More Convenient - On the other side of convenience, it can sometimes be more convenient to breast feed as bottle warming/making facilities are not always available in every location you may be in or you may run out of milk on your adventures!!

Breastfeeding is Free - Baby formula comes with a hefty price tag at almost £10 a tub and you can rarely find it cheaper than that.  Breast milk won't cost you a penny!

Contraception - Breastfeeding is said to be a natural contraceptive!

I Might Regret It - I may really regret not trying to breastfeed Harry.. but I figure I will most likely have another baby in the future and the option is there for then!

What are your thoughts on breastfeeding/bottle feeding??  What will you choose? 
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15 comments

  1. I still haven't decided.. its the hardest decision I have had to make during pregnancy for sure! I'm just going to decide when he gets here and if it feels natural then Ill try it if not then i wont! Its very very hard to make a decision and stick to it.. My midwife hasn't asked yet but I have the health visitor out on Friday so I am sure she will be pushing it! I hope I can be brave and stick to what I want to do and not feel pressure!

    Whatever any mum decides then that is what is best for baby!

    Love

    SJ X

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  2. It such a tough decision SJ!! You will be brave i'm sure.. you aren't exactly a push over ;-) xx

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  3. Great post Lucie! Its lovely to see somebody so open minded about both sides and making the decision that's right for them. I hope you're able to stick to what you want without pressure

    Hayley
    Sparkles & Stretchmarks - UK Based parenting blog
    xxx

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  4. Since you asked, I didn't breastfeed for very long AT ALL! It's something I TOTALLY regret giving up on and in my opinion (again, since you asked) is that you should absolutely give it a shot. It's THE most natural thing there is aside from getting pregnant in the first place. I was surrounded by so much pressure and confusion and ignorance when I had my baby. I had no idea what I was doing and didn't read a single book or article or website or ask a single professional/mother what to expect and how to go about it. Because I introduced the bottle during the first few days, I think it confused my baby and she preferred the bottle over me, which made breastfeeding more difficult. I didn't commit to it like I could/should have. But, during the few weeks of my on again/off again breastfeeding...I loved it! Yes, it was painful at first but that only lasted a week or 2. It was completely worth overcoming to experience such a bond with my daughter. I don't know what it was, but I felt so connected to her and needed by her and she was her most peaceful when she was latched on. When we have our 2nd, I'm breastfeeding without a doubt. I'm committing my body to the baby because that's my job as a mom and it is what's best. Of course, there are exceptions to rules and medical reasons can get in the way of breastfeeding. However, I think women these days give up too soon and blame their bad experience on not producing enough milk (which is what I did). Of course I didn't produce enough, I wasn't feeding enough to signal my body to produce more! Women have been doing it for centuries without fancy pumps and formulas. I also think of it this way: Not every woman is fortunate enough to be able to have children, therefore, will never be able to experience breastfeeding. You get that chance. Trying it with your first will give you some experience so that you'll know how to do it with kid #2 or at least know what you did wrong with kid #1 (if it fails) so you can improve and perfect it. I think you should at least give it a try, and then revisit your decision after a few days to a week and either stick with it or move to formula. That's my 2 cents :) www.momistabeginnings.com

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  5. Thank you for your comment! Its great to hear different points of views and experiences as it will definitely help me to think about it in the long run! x

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  6. This is certainly one of those topics that divides opinion so I think it’s brilliant you’ve given it so much thought and raised it on your blog (I’ve loved reading your posts, it’s just taken me this long to comment!). What you’ve decided is what will be best for you and baby Harry and only you can know that. I really hate how some midwives/health visitors/other mums judge or make comments on what can only be your decision.

    I breastfed Henry for 9 months and I really loved the experience and plan to do the same with our No.2. It was incredibly uncomfortable for the first week or two so did take some determination. It is was also brutal doing all the night feeds on my own (Richard got off lightly!) but it then suddenly became so easy and overall proved to be the right choice for our family.

    I think the most important thing is for mums to make sure they do what makes them happy as that in turn will make them a good mum. I know friends that have struggled with breastfeeding as they felt pressure to, this only served to make them miserable and therefore not enjoy those first few precious months.

    xx

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  7. Ahhhh loved your comment Katie! Thanks so much :-) I think there is so much pressure on both sides of it and who knows I may completely change my mind as well! I think everyone should be able to make their own choice and not be judged at all for it!
    Xx

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  8. Love the post, it really divides peoples opinion. I'm due in October and I've decided not to breastfeed for a lot of the reasons you've listed. This is my personal choice and my partner agrees we should go with what I'm comfortable with, but our family think I should at least "give it a go"... When speaking to the midwives they support any choice I make. I won't be "giving it a go" I will be going with my instinct and not- breastfeeding, I believe baby will be happier if mum is :-) xx

    pollyslittleworld.blogspot.co.uk

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  9. Thank you Polly!
    Love your comment.. it is such a difficult subject to speak about as people have strong opinions on either way! I think the exact same as you if the mum is happy then so will be baby :)
    Congrats :) xx

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  10. I think you should a least give it a one month try. I breastfed my first for 6 months exclusevely, the first two weeks i hate it i was in soooo much pain, but in my culture it is the way to do it, breastfeed i mean. So i kept doing it, eventually the pain goes away, and it becomes the most beautiful experience, cheaper, and cleaner since you dont have to carry all those bottles, washing them, im having my second in april and im definetely doing it again, even though i know it wont be easy the first days. Breastfeed takes time, mostly an hour every time, so if you want to try with your second one its going to be difficult as you are going to have a toddler in tow and THOSE are a handful. Give it a better thought, for your baby. It is bonding time like no other, and is an experience that nobody but you can continue having after pregnancy is over.

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  11. I really respect you for writing this on your blog - I had my little boy 3 months ago and after initially thinking I would breastfeed, the more I looked into it and thought about it, I decided not to and I don't regret my decision.

    I only had him have one feed off me in the hospital straight after being born and that was it, I'd already bought bottles with me to the hospital and I was adamant that was the way I was going to go.

    It's a very tricky thing to talk about as so many people are absolutely and completely 100% for breastfeeding. I think that it should be the mum's choice completely and there shouldn't be so much pressure at all.

    Me and my sister were formula fed as babies and so were my parents and my boyfriend - we all turned out fine, haha!

    I picked to formula feed for the same reasons as you did and I don't think there's anything wrong with that - a happy mum makes a happy baby.

    My son is a happy little baby and has been putting on weight at an extremely healthy rate and meeting all of his development milestones so far, I personally don't think there's much difference which way you do it - just that you pick the way of feeding which makes you happy.

    Just discovered your blog and am now following! Good luck :-) xx

    Curls & Swirls Beauty Blog

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  12. Thank you so much for your comment Kat!!! I too agree that you should pick the way of feeding that makes you and baby happiest :)
    I wish there wasn't such pressure attached to breastfeeding as I think sometimes this pressure can actually make people turn the other way!

    Thanks for following I am now following you to, your blog is great! xx

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  13. I've been meaning to reply to this since I read it when you first posted it, sorry it's taken so long!!

    Until about 36 weeks pregnant with Austin, I wanted to try breastfeeding. Then I did a massive u-turn, I have no idea why, but I woke up one day and just really didn't want to breastfeed.

    I am glad I made this decision. After a long labour, I lay on the bed in the recovery ward, very tired, still not quite believing our little man was finally here. And I watched my husband, feeding our baby boy his first ever little bottle. It was one of the best moments ever, to see daddy and his little man bonding with each other so soon after Austin had been born.

    For me, that moment made my decision worthwhile.

    Austin is now nearly a year old and is a very happy, healthy boy. I am pregnant with our second baby and intend to bottle feed this little one too. Unless I do a u-turn in my decision again..!xx

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  14. Aww thank you for your comment!! Its really nice to hear from people who have been through the decision making and are happy with their choice :) xx

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